SEXY FISHNET LEGS

Hello Darlings, thanks for stopping by, Hope you enjoyed the ‘Style in Motion’ video above for this post

Todays  post features my now favourite look of all.. This long Pinstripped Jacket from Zara that i wear as a dress with large fishnet (that is all the current rage) had me feeling all kinds of  sexy and confident  and i believe it shows.  But looking at these  images i realise just how far i have come.

I received an email recently from someone who asked me “how can i be confident and have a no care attitude like you” ?I interpreted this to mean how can i not care what people think of me and be confident in who i was.. my answer was pretty simple – You truly have to not give a shit about what people think of you… and that how i try to live now..

It has not always been that way for me and growing up I had very mixed feelings about myself and how I looked, like most people, I cared too much about what people thought about me and their opinions always got the better of me.

I experienced a lot of criticism, bitchiness even from my closest friends. But For now, I will talk only of the experience i had with regards to my legs.. Stay with me!

Being the Tom Boy that I was, I played a hell of a lot of football on the concrete makeshift football pitch we had in primary school – it is safe to say I encountered a lot of injuries particularly on my legs which resulted in a lot bruises and marks.

No amount of injuries slowed me down and I continued to play. Quite honestly I was completely oblivious to these marks! Well Until one day in secondary school (ready for PE in tiny shorts) a girl said “nice legs, shame about all them marks.. damn its so much”

Wow!  That hit me like a ton of bricks and till today I have never forgotten that incident and how I felt hearing that and the round of nodding agreement by the other girls around her.

I felt exposed and instantly felt ashamed of my legs. Now she may have not meant bad by it and was simply making an observation but her words effected me to the point that I went on for the next 6 yesrs of my life covering up my legs, with tights long socks, fishnets, and long boots. They would never see the light of day again, ever! ( i told myself at the time)

During that time, I brought into any and every thing (including abrasive procedures) that promised to remove my scars – none worked.

Time fortunately became my healer  the marks became a little less visible  and i also grew in confidence (albeit surface level confidence) learning to accept myself just as i was. I won’t lie, it took time, to truly be comfortable with exposing my legs after years of covering them up as the scars were still visible (and still are till today), but to my shock horror, i received more complements about my legs than anything else. How i had let this one girl and her comment completely dictate how i lived and dressed for 6 years is just crazy.

Oh what i would tell me young self now, and what i tell my daughter. They are and will always be cruel (sometimes, just insensitive) people out there that will always have something to say, about any and everything. Even if you are the ripest fruit out there, someone somewhere will find fault. ‘ah she’s just too sweet’ 🙂 

Allowing what people think and say effect us is giving them power, too much power when in truth they are ‘nobody’ in our world.

Now i think, yes my legs are ‘marky’ but so the F what? and trust me i have had comments like ‘oh shit whats wrong with her legs’ on my instagram comments even up to 6 months ago, but i think ‘oh really, thats all you see and choose to point out’? and i therefore question the confidence they have in  themselves.. because do truly confident people look for let alone comment about faults on other people?

Also understanding that, its none of our business what people think about us, its their business based on their upbringing, believes, environment and sometimes how they view themselves. It is THEIR Believes and opinion, and it shouldn’t matter and it certainly shouldn’t effect us.

 It took me a long time to realise this,  getting to the stage of not giving a F is a difficult journey  but you know,  think of the alternative and my experience and know that it is a much better and healthier way of living.

I thank God that i was eventually woken.

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IMG_4725I used to wear fishnets to cover up my ‘marky’ legs now I’m wearing them just because, i think they look pretty damn good. I’ve truly grown to love the body I’m in. Though i am working on improving it as it can so be better.. especially my desert belly but i like the way i look especially in this jacket, turned dress with large fishnets, 4.5″ and of course my hat.. truly i felt confident.

If you’ve had similar experience or can relate in any way, i would love to hear from you so leave a  comment below.. otherwise just enjoy my new favourite look and i hope you found some inspiration from it.

Links as always are below, the jacket is sold out at Zara, BUT i found a seller on eBay selling it, cheaper then the original price 🙂 You are welcome.

Till next time, Ciao X

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10 Comments

  1. Reply

    Barbara Adeniken

    March 6, 2017

    Let me just say you have my heart with each post. We must have been on the same wavelength as I just bought the same coat from Zara and the way you’ve styled yours has given me major tips and idea. I completely can relate with the body shaming in school. Sadly mine was also my legs, because I was incredibly skinny it meant my legs were even skinnier, the girls used to laugh and say I had chicken legs and I used to absolutely hate my thin legs. Although who is laughing now ehy. Team legs with strong calves that go on for days. Haha The message you give your daughter is a beautiful and I am certain she will grow up to be a beautiful confident woman just like mummy. xxx

    • Reply

      sade

      March 8, 2017

      We are Fashion Spirit Sisters. I umm’d and ahh’d about it before buying it.. when it was delivered i fell in love but immediately took a blade to the belt holes. I knew i had to wear it as a dress! the belt is awkward i feel. but such a fab 80’s vibe jacket with its loose fit and wide shoulders. Love it.. and I’m sure you love yours too 😉

      I bet the girls that called you “too skinny” were probably hating on your body. KMT to these hateful bitches!!! ill save my “skinny” story for another time..
      Thank you for your kind words Beautiful, so appreciate it and the continued support. And thank you for sharing your story.. I’m sure it will inspire others XX #TeamLOVE TeamLEGS 🙂 XXXX

  2. Reply

    Egbaii

    March 6, 2017

    What a brilliant write up! You inspire me always. you’re one of the beautiful soul I love in this life of a sin. Flawless mother you’re and your daughter is lucky to have you in her life! Why should we care about what other think about us ? it’s their problem they should deal with it. You re a great styler! Love the fishnet look❤️

    • Reply

      sade

      March 8, 2017

      You are the BESTEST!! Thank you for your kind words beautiful.. it means a lot. Stay Fabulous Mwah Xxx

  3. Reply

    lanatria ellis

    March 6, 2017

    I thought I was the only one with leg issues. Girl, we are kindred spirits! I have 3 brothers and I wanted to follow them and do whatever they did and my legs paid the price. My oh-so-critical brought me to ‘leg shame’. She would always say ‘Neeka! (my nickname) you legs are so beat and banged up’.I mean she wasn’t wrong , but damn though lol! Time too became my healer and friend .Because I grew up in a strict religious home, my legs were usually covered with a long skirt (until I had money to buy short ones and change into them on the school bus…I had no shame).The skirts, well that’s another story lol.My legs were always unnecessarily thicker in the calves than most of the other girls, and my mom always reminded me of that too.She is the source of my insecurities and I remind her daily lol.It wasn’t until college that my friends always complimented my legs that I was like “yea, they are nice”,and my big sister as well.I constantly compared myself to her because she was everything I wanted to be even though now she says that about me.Her approval always means so much to me,but let me stop this is long enough.Thanks for sharing such a story of growing pains.
    p.s. I always liked your legs.I have big eyes and notice everything and never noticed any marks.Stay fab!
    -Caribbean cowgirl

    • Reply

      sade

      March 8, 2017

      AWW thank you for sharing your story, we have so much in common! and how funny, i too have a sister i completely looked up to growing up and its funny how roles have reversed but she continues to inspire me. lol @ your big eyes.. but its not because my scares are not there for you to see, its because confident women like yourself do not look for flaws 🙂 XXXXX

  4. Reply

    Biki

    March 7, 2017

    Really loved reading this article- thanks for sharing your story, its so important to know what people have struggled with and what makes them who they are, behind the ‘perfect pictures’. I too have issues with my legs which are getting kinda better, but most of my insecurities stem from me and what I see. Though when I went to have a pedicure, my pedicurist said the meanest and most insensitive comment about my legs. IN my 20s I would have have stopped the procedure then and there and covered up.
    But the great thing about age is you really do give less of a shit…your stories will really inform your daughter and make her all the wiser when it comes to body image.
    And wow-weeee your legs look amazing in those fishnets, if those girls could see you now from school (which I’m sure they have), you got the last laugh. The End.
    ( :

    • Reply

      sade

      March 8, 2017

      Thank you for your lovely message and many thanks you for taking time to share your experience! Yes completely! things do get better in age, with learning to not give a shit and loving the body we’re in, in all its glory… Kisses XXX

  5. Reply

    Gabriel

    March 8, 2017

    Fantastic write up. As humans we are extremely vulnerable and emotionally delicate beings. Things we were told as children and even as adults sometimes taints our own perspective of ourselves daily. When all you’ve ever heard in life is praise it’s easy to be confident. But when your appearance has been questioned it’s much harder to draw confidence from. In this current era of social media, body shaming etc is at its highest and I feel the world desperately needs more individuals like yourself to reverse the state of these daunting times. Your confidence is inspirational and the fact I know that every word here is true makes it even more inspiring to me. Keep on inspiring ?? P.S I thank God my daughter has an Aunty like you to look up to.

    • Reply

      sade

      March 8, 2017

      Oh WoW!! Thank you so much.. I’m very touched 🙂 How sweet:)XX

      I thought i had it bad growing up but like you rightly said, with social media, i feel very sorry for young kids out there, social bullying in all forms is so rife. We can only but try to educate our little ones and inspire them to truly Love and have unshakable confidence in themselves.

      It is very important that i tell my stories through great pictures so people (particularly young women) understand that life really is not a perfect picture and we have all grown through insecurities. There is nothing to be ashamed of and i can only hope that someone somewhere will be inspired by the story. X

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