Hello Darlings, thanks for stopping by, Hope you enjoyed the ‘Style in Motion’ video above for this post
Todays post features my now favourite look of all.. This long Pinstripped Jacket from Zara that i wear as a dress with large fishnet (that is all the current rage) had me feeling all kinds of sexy and confident and i believe it shows. But looking at these images i realise just how far i have come.
I received an email recently from someone who asked me “how can i be confident and have a no care attitude like you” ?I interpreted this to mean how can i not care what people think of me and be confident in who i was.. my answer was pretty simple – You truly have to not give a shit about what people think of you… and that how i try to live now..
It has not always been that way for me and growing up I had very mixed feelings about myself and how I looked, like most people, I cared too much about what people thought about me and their opinions always got the better of me.
I experienced a lot of criticism, bitchiness even from my closest friends. But For now, I will talk only of the experience i had with regards to my legs.. Stay with me!
Being the Tom Boy that I was, I played a hell of a lot of football on the concrete makeshift football pitch we had in primary school – it is safe to say I encountered a lot of injuries particularly on my legs which resulted in a lot bruises and marks.
No amount of injuries slowed me down and I continued to play. Quite honestly I was completely oblivious to these marks! Well Until one day in secondary school (ready for PE in tiny shorts) a girl said “nice legs, shame about all them marks.. damn its so much”
Wow! That hit me like a ton of bricks and till today I have never forgotten that incident and how I felt hearing that and the round of nodding agreement by the other girls around her.
I felt exposed and instantly felt ashamed of my legs. Now she may have not meant bad by it and was simply making an observation but her words effected me to the point that I went on for the next 6 yesrs of my life covering up my legs, with tights long socks, fishnets, and long boots. They would never see the light of day again, ever! ( i told myself at the time)
During that time, I brought into any and every thing (including abrasive procedures) that promised to remove my scars – none worked.
Time fortunately became my healer the marks became a little less visible and i also grew in confidence (albeit surface level confidence) learning to accept myself just as i was. I won’t lie, it took time, to truly be comfortable with exposing my legs after years of covering them up as the scars were still visible (and still are till today), but to my shock horror, i received more complements about my legs than anything else. How i had let this one girl and her comment completely dictate how i lived and dressed for 6 years is just crazy.
Oh what i would tell me young self now, and what i tell my daughter. They are and will always be cruel (sometimes, just insensitive) people out there that will always have something to say, about any and everything. Even if you are the ripest fruit out there, someone somewhere will find fault. ‘ah she’s just too sweet’ 🙂
Allowing what people think and say effect us is giving them power, too much power when in truth they are ‘nobody’ in our world.
Now i think, yes my legs are ‘marky’ but so the F what? and trust me i have had comments like ‘oh shit whats wrong with her legs’ on my instagram comments even up to 6 months ago, but i think ‘oh really, thats all you see and choose to point out’? and i therefore question the confidence they have in themselves.. because do truly confident people look for let alone comment about faults on other people?
Also understanding that, its none of our business what people think about us, its their business based on their upbringing, believes, environment and sometimes how they view themselves. It is THEIR Believes and opinion, and it shouldn’t matter and it certainly shouldn’t effect us.
It took me a long time to realise this, getting to the stage of not giving a F is a difficult journey but you know, think of the alternative and my experience and know that it is a much better and healthier way of living.
I thank God that i was eventually woken.
I used to wear fishnets to cover up my ‘marky’ legs now I’m wearing them just because, i think they look pretty damn good. I’ve truly grown to love the body I’m in. Though i am working on improving it as it can so be better.. especially my desert belly but i like the way i look especially in this jacket, turned dress with large fishnets, 4.5″ and of course my hat.. truly i felt confident.
If you’ve had similar experience or can relate in any way, i would love to hear from you so leave a comment below.. otherwise just enjoy my new favourite look and i hope you found some inspiration from it.
Links as always are below, the jacket is sold out at Zara, BUT i found a seller on eBay selling it, cheaper then the original price 🙂 You are welcome.
Till next time, Ciao X